Read Ebook: How to conduct a small mail order business by Skinner W E William E

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Ebook has 110 lines and 6046 words, and 3 pages

"Virtue increases under a weight or burden" and results increase with a comprehensive expenditure of money in good advertising mediums.

"Better late than never." The golden opportunity is still open to him who would enrich himself by judicious advertising. None other way will pay.

"Mind moves matter." Therefore exercise your mind to advertise so as to stir the gray matter of the brains of the people and affect their pocket-books.

Good goods will sell to good people constantly. Poor goods only once. Don't let people say, "after having praised their wine they sell us vinegar."

"There is no lock but a golden key will open it," except that of the people's pocket-book. First class ads will do this with golden results. When people think they want a thing, they do want it and they get it.

Free.

There's the catch word of all humanity. Fifty years ago it was the most potent word in the language, and all the advertising experts who have developed since have not succeeded in devising one to succeed it.

Look over the papers which are read by the simple country folk, and note how that word stands out all over them. The article advertised goes in agate type below it. The particulars about what stamps or coins must be sent to secure the "free" article, go in minion. The ad. may occupy but an inch, and half of the inch may consist of the one word "Free," but the advertising evidently pays if continuance signifies profit.

The Old Story.

A man generally knows his own business well enough to make money out of it. When he attempts another business he finds that some other fellow has learned that business better than he has, evidently. Few men ever learn enough about more than one business to make both or all of them pay.

Profitable Catalogues.

Mr. John Lynn, of 48 Bond St., New York is a successful dealer in novelties; his catalogue is very attractive.

Another successful dealer is Chas. E. Marshall, Lockport, N. Y. His catalogue is a winner.

Montgomery Ward & Co., Chicago, do the largest mail order business in the world. Their catalogue is quite a large volume in itself.

Gets One on Depew.

This is one of the stories about Chauncey M. Depew and a railroad pass that is being told nowadays in local railroad circles.

The president of the Waupaca and Nishna Railroad company went to see the mild-mannered president of the Vanderbilt system.

"What can I do for you?" Mr. Depew asked, letting the smile he uses on such occasions have full swing at the visitor.

"I dropped in to see you, Mr. Depew, to ask for an exchange of courtesies. I am the president of the Waupaca and Nishna Railroad company. I would like to have a pass over your road and will extend the same courtesy to yourself over my road."

Depew looked thoughtful for a minute. Then he said:

"Where is your road?"

"Why, it's out in Wisconsin."

"Is it rated in Poor's manual?"

"Oh, yes, indeed; we paid a nice dividend last year."

"Strange. I never heard of your road. How long is it?"

"We are operating sixty-seven miles this year."

"What, sixty-seven miles, and you call that an exchange of courtesy, and the Vanderbilt system has its thousands of miles?"

Depew assumed his most cavalier air as he launched that question at the head of the president of the Waupaca and Nishna and then he waited for a reply.

"Well, Mr. Depew," said the western railroad president as he arose to go, "your road may be a little longer than mine, but it ain't any wider."

His Joke Worked Badly.

A young man who seemed to be boiling over to do something smart was a passenger on a Michigan avenue car the other day. After racking his massive brain for a while he took out a silver dollar and laid it on the seat and took a seat opposite. The car soon stopped at a crossing to let on an old woman with a basket. She saw the empty seat and the dollar, and it didn't take her over thirty seconds to drop herself into the place and the dollar into her pocket.

"Excuse me, ma'am," said the joker, "but I've lost a dollar. I think I left it on that seat."

"I don't," she bluntly replied.

"But I'm sure of it. Did you pick up a dollar?"

"None of your business, sir."

"But all of us saw you pick it up, ma'am, and I can prove it was mine."

"Look a' here, young chap," she said, as she put down her basket, "if it's a row you want you'll find me ready. I allow no one to walk on me."

"Come on, then," she said, as she stood up and doubled up her fists. "I am a peaceful woman, and I want to get along the easiest way, but if I must I will."

Everybody began to clap and laugh, and the smart Aleck took a drop off the platform without asking what it was all about.

Mike's Dilemma.

Mike is an Irishman just fresh from the Emerald isle, who recently came to Hackensack, N. J., and was employed by two gentlemen, each keeping a horse in the same stable, to look after their equines. One day Mr. Jones told Mike to hitch up his horse and bring it around to his residence.

Mike did as he was bidden, but when Mr. Jones saw the turnout he said: "Why, Mike, that is not my horse, that is Mr. Smith's animal."

"Begorra," promptly replied Mike, "so it is. I knowed that wasn't your horse, sir, but I couldn't quite make up my mind which horse belonged to the other gintleman."

A Rank Failure.

"I don't believe whippings do children any good," said Mrs. Wiggins. "Why, I whipped Johnny at the photographer's three times because he wouldn't look pleasant and he still looked as cross and disagreeable as ever."

At Reduced Speed.

Uncle Hays--'Member the Hawkins boys who ran away to jine a theatre company?

Aunt Marthy--Why, yes! What about 'em?

Uncle Hays --They've walked back.

Two Feminine Views of Adam.

First Nineteenth Century Girl--I never did have any opinion of Adam. A man who could excuse himself by saying, "The woman tempted me," had none of the instincts of a gentleman.

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